Two Days until my transplant. This is the last day I will be at home with the kids, so I am spending it playing with them and making sure all the little things around the house are done that will need to be done in the next couple weeks. Lots of little errands and such.
I am still feeling at peace. No real anxiety or worry at this point. I really just feel ready to get to the next phase....recovery.
I will try to post each day as they come, please bear with me as I don't take medications well and may not be up to posting early on. Our family page, however, will probably be updated regularly by Kyla.
Keep my kids in mind over the next week or so. They are used to Daddy being home everyday and Lincoln is old enough to know something big is happening. I have tried to explain to him as best I can, but I know being separated from me for a week will be hard.
Thanks to everyone who has been so supportive of our family in the days and weeks running up to this transplant, we have truly been overwhelmed.
Tuesday, November 12, 2013
Monday, October 28, 2013
Shark bite or gored by bull? vote now.
As of my last call to Baptist, 5 of 6 packets of possible donors had been ruled out. The average wait time for the list is 2-3 years and I was rapidly approaching 2. My hope and faith in a living donor was quickly diminishing. And as is often the story, when my faith had been stretched to near breaking, God came through in a big way. The last person tested was a patient of mine who I only saw for a few visits and had asked if she could be tested. This person barely knew me, had no previous connection with me, and had no obligation for such a heroic act towards me. I gladly gave her a packet and never really thought anything else about it. I got the call last month that my last possible donor was a match and the transplant has been scheduled for November 14th. It always amazes me how God will always work things out, even if it means bringing someone into your life to bring the miracle that you are waiting for. I would ask that God would bless this person "according to their works" as she is literally saving my life by a HUGE sacrifice on her part. She is giving me the opportunity to be there for my family and my kids for a long, long time. For all the media who tell us how bad the human race is on the news every night, I believe that there is still the power to change lives in each of us. I hope that I can take this gift and do just that.
I have also been blessed by yet another patient who owns Texas Roadhouse on LR Blvd in Hickory. She has asked if she could do a fundraiser before my surgery and this will take place on November 3rd. Again, every need is always met and I am so humbled by the amount of support and love that I have been given my all those around me.
I will be working my last day on November 8th and will be admitted to Baptist Hospital on November 13th for final testing and my transplant will take place on November 14th. I'm told that if all goes well, I will be able to come home sometime early the next week. I should be out of work 8-12 weeks. I will have to make fairly constant trips back and forth to Baptist after the transplant (2-3 times per week) for the first couple months and then down to 1 time a month for around 6 months. As I will be out of work and probably going stir crazy, I will try to post updates fairly regularly.
As for me, I am at peace with this endeavor. God kept me 3 years ago when I was hit by a car and came out unscathed, even though I had the bone mass of a 90 year old due to kidney failure. He has not only been with me throughout my diagnosis and dialysis, but has used it to grow me and change me into a better person. He is still working and I am excited to see where he will take me. My goals for recovery are simple. I want my story to be an inspiration to others to what God can do in a life and what he can accomplish. I want others to feel that they too can do anything that God lays on their hearts to do, no matter the situation. I want to be "more than a conqueror" over this situation. With that, if anyone reading this blog has questions about kidney failure, dialysis, etc; please let me know. My email address is two21bakerst@yahoo.com and I am on facebook.
Lastly, after my surgery, I will have about a 7 inch scar on one side of my abdomen. I am torn between the story that I was bitten by a shark while surfing of the coast of Australia or gored by a bull in Pamplona. I am taking votes now.
I have also been blessed by yet another patient who owns Texas Roadhouse on LR Blvd in Hickory. She has asked if she could do a fundraiser before my surgery and this will take place on November 3rd. Again, every need is always met and I am so humbled by the amount of support and love that I have been given my all those around me.
I will be working my last day on November 8th and will be admitted to Baptist Hospital on November 13th for final testing and my transplant will take place on November 14th. I'm told that if all goes well, I will be able to come home sometime early the next week. I should be out of work 8-12 weeks. I will have to make fairly constant trips back and forth to Baptist after the transplant (2-3 times per week) for the first couple months and then down to 1 time a month for around 6 months. As I will be out of work and probably going stir crazy, I will try to post updates fairly regularly.
As for me, I am at peace with this endeavor. God kept me 3 years ago when I was hit by a car and came out unscathed, even though I had the bone mass of a 90 year old due to kidney failure. He has not only been with me throughout my diagnosis and dialysis, but has used it to grow me and change me into a better person. He is still working and I am excited to see where he will take me. My goals for recovery are simple. I want my story to be an inspiration to others to what God can do in a life and what he can accomplish. I want others to feel that they too can do anything that God lays on their hearts to do, no matter the situation. I want to be "more than a conqueror" over this situation. With that, if anyone reading this blog has questions about kidney failure, dialysis, etc; please let me know. My email address is two21bakerst@yahoo.com and I am on facebook.
Lastly, after my surgery, I will have about a 7 inch scar on one side of my abdomen. I am torn between the story that I was bitten by a shark while surfing of the coast of Australia or gored by a bull in Pamplona. I am taking votes now.
Monday, July 22, 2013
from broken pot to work of art
Let me first start off by saying "sorry It's been so long since I posted" since that seem to be the obligatory thing to say. Truth is, kidney failure seems to put things in perspective and blogging, while I do feel is important to let people know what is going on, is a far second to spending precious time with my family nowadays. I get a lot of questions about how "everything is going", so I will start with a quick synopsis of the medical stuff. As of now, 4 out of 5 of my voluntary donors have been ruled out as possible candidates. While these folks will not be giving me a kidney, in my mind, it is as if you have already had the surgery just by being tested. I pray that God will bless you as though the surgery was already a success. I am still on the list, coming up on a full year now. Average wait time is 2-3 years, so I am well on my way. Dialysis is still going well, doing it all on my own through the day. All my reading seem to be doing well, not much fatigue issues, still working and riding my bike (though much slower than I would like).
That being said, one of the biggest questions that I seem to get is really an unspoken question. It is the question in the eyes of my fellow Christians and family that do not understand why God hasn't miraculously healed me yet. That is what we believe...right? I know I always did. I will admit, to be honest, I struggled with this. Why are you not healing me?! I answered this, or rather, God answered this question in a previous blog entitled "God...why?" which you can read below. However, I have had a few further revelations since that post. One night, while I was reading about Abraham, I feel like God gave me an insight not previously seen. He had promised Abraham that he would be the father of many nations. Then, he asked him to take his son to the top of the mountain to sacrifice him. As he was climbing that mountain, Issac kept asking him where the sacrifice was. He told him that God would provide. It suddenly struck me that God had already promised to keep me and that I was going to be fine. I am now walking up the mountain towards his already supplied provision. My job is to keep my faith and keep walking. The rest is up to him. And just imagine the view from the top.
Since I have been a Christian, I have always asked God to make me into the person, father, husband, and therapist he envisioned when he formed me. While this is hard to say, I was not that person. Before this trial, I had become entitled and had started to focus on things that didn't matter. I would never say that I am glad that I have gone through kidney failure, but I see now how God is changing me through this trial. I am occasionally getting glimpses of the man God is forming me into and I like him much better. Truth is, I would never have been able to change myself or allow Him to change me without being being broken down first. I'm beginning to see that God is more concerned with healing the really important issues in my life....greed, pride, selfishness. Kidney failure, to Him, is just a physical ailment that was conquered with the stripes on his back at the cross. He is doing a much greater work than that in my life and I can't wait to see where He is taking me. So, to answer the question of how I am doing, I am doing great. I would encourage my friends and family that are going through something difficult to ask God to give you a glimpse of how he is going to "turn all things to the good of those who love him". You might just get a glimpse of the wondrous plan He has for you.....I know I did.
That being said, one of the biggest questions that I seem to get is really an unspoken question. It is the question in the eyes of my fellow Christians and family that do not understand why God hasn't miraculously healed me yet. That is what we believe...right? I know I always did. I will admit, to be honest, I struggled with this. Why are you not healing me?! I answered this, or rather, God answered this question in a previous blog entitled "God...why?" which you can read below. However, I have had a few further revelations since that post. One night, while I was reading about Abraham, I feel like God gave me an insight not previously seen. He had promised Abraham that he would be the father of many nations. Then, he asked him to take his son to the top of the mountain to sacrifice him. As he was climbing that mountain, Issac kept asking him where the sacrifice was. He told him that God would provide. It suddenly struck me that God had already promised to keep me and that I was going to be fine. I am now walking up the mountain towards his already supplied provision. My job is to keep my faith and keep walking. The rest is up to him. And just imagine the view from the top.
Since I have been a Christian, I have always asked God to make me into the person, father, husband, and therapist he envisioned when he formed me. While this is hard to say, I was not that person. Before this trial, I had become entitled and had started to focus on things that didn't matter. I would never say that I am glad that I have gone through kidney failure, but I see now how God is changing me through this trial. I am occasionally getting glimpses of the man God is forming me into and I like him much better. Truth is, I would never have been able to change myself or allow Him to change me without being being broken down first. I'm beginning to see that God is more concerned with healing the really important issues in my life....greed, pride, selfishness. Kidney failure, to Him, is just a physical ailment that was conquered with the stripes on his back at the cross. He is doing a much greater work than that in my life and I can't wait to see where He is taking me. So, to answer the question of how I am doing, I am doing great. I would encourage my friends and family that are going through something difficult to ask God to give you a glimpse of how he is going to "turn all things to the good of those who love him". You might just get a glimpse of the wondrous plan He has for you.....I know I did.
Sunday, January 20, 2013
Phenomenal Cosmic Powers....itty bitty living space
One year ago on Jan. 19th, I was diagnosed with kidney failure. Over the last year, a lot has changed in our lives and God has taught me so much. We take a lot of things in our life for granted, we put too much importance on little things that don't matter, but most importantly, God's presence in our lives gives us more power than most of us ever tap. Our pastor taught on the miracles surrounding Elisha's life a few weeks ago. When he was surrounded by the enemy, he prayed that his servant's eyes would be opened to see the truth and he beheld the circle of angels that surrounded them for protection. These angels blinded the entire army that came against the man of God. In Egypt, one angel of death killed the first born of every Egyptian family in one night. Angels are powerful beings that can carry out the will of God. However, if we read about Jacob wrestling with angel, he fought with this being for an entire night and the angel could not prevail against him. He finally touched the hollow of his hip and put it out of place so that he could escape. While angels are powerful beings that can wipe out an entire army, we as Christians, have more power than that because of God's spirit in us. Think about that. Imagine the power that God has bestowed in our lives. Why do we constantly hear Christians making statements like "Boy, the devil is really fighting me lately" and "I'm just trying to hold on"? We were never meant to merely hold on, we were meant to be "more than conquerors" and "to fly on wings like eagles".
If I could pass along one message to my friends and family from my last year, it's this....live the life God has given you. Life is going to throw curve balls at you. Bills are going to come that you don't know how you will pay, careers will rise and fall, and kidneys will fail. However, through all of these trials that seem so huge to us, if we could see these through
God's eyes, we would see that these are just speed bumps in our life. God said "I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jer 29:11" The Almighty Creator of the Universe specifically has plans for your life that can take you to places you never even dreamed, you just have to hold on for the ride. We were called to be salt and light in the world with an imbued power that can "say to the mountain, be thou removed and cast into the sea. Mark 11:23". Let's all start living the lives we were meant to live.
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."--Marianne Williamson
If I could pass along one message to my friends and family from my last year, it's this....live the life God has given you. Life is going to throw curve balls at you. Bills are going to come that you don't know how you will pay, careers will rise and fall, and kidneys will fail. However, through all of these trials that seem so huge to us, if we could see these through
God's eyes, we would see that these are just speed bumps in our life. God said "I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jer 29:11" The Almighty Creator of the Universe specifically has plans for your life that can take you to places you never even dreamed, you just have to hold on for the ride. We were called to be salt and light in the world with an imbued power that can "say to the mountain, be thou removed and cast into the sea. Mark 11:23". Let's all start living the lives we were meant to live.
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."--Marianne Williamson
Monday, January 14, 2013
Family and spouse and Mickey's house
We spent another wonderful New Year's Day at Disney world this year. The kids had a blast (ok...so did I). Lincoln was able to ride his first real roller coaster and absolutely loved it. He squealed the whole time and then demanded to get right back on...looks like he will be an adrenaline junkie like his dad. We ate too much, stayed up too late, and tried to accomplish too much everyday; just like you should on vacation! While we were there, we had to convince Lincoln to take a nap during the day to make it through the rest of the day. This was not the easiest task. It would usually involve us telling him "no, we can't stay any longer now, but if you will take a nap, we can come back tonight and stay as long as you want." This would often involve a two year old melt down about staying. We just wanted him to rest so we could have a good rest of the day, but he couldn't see it that way. He was fixated on getting what he wanted right then, even though it wasn't what was better for him. I couldn't help seeing the similarities in Acts 3 when Peter and John were asked by the beggar at the gate Beautiful for alms. "Silver and Gold have I none, but what I have I freely give, Arise and walk." There are three important parts to this answer. The first is the answer no, I will not give you what you ask. The next, and possibly the most important, is but. Then, there is a demand for a action that will lead to a better gift. Sounds a lot like our situation with Lincoln, but more importantly, I wonder about myself as a "child" of God. I wonder how many times God has answered my prayers with "no, but" and all I heard was the no. How many blessings have I missed by not following the demands of God after the "but"? After all, He promised to open the floodgates of Heaven and pour out blessings that we could not contain.
My New Year's Resolution for 2013 is to not miss the "buts" that God gives me, but to accept both his demands for me and the blessings that he has in store for me.
Happy New Year's for all my family and friends, I hope that God's blessings fall on each of you this year.
On the kidney transplant front, I'm still awaiting the final testing from one of my living donors. I ask my friends and family to pray for these folks. God said that what you do for the least of these, you do for me. He also promised to return their blessing a hundred fold. While I'm not sure what a hundred fold return on a kidney is, I pray Lord, let it be.
Anthony
My New Year's Resolution for 2013 is to not miss the "buts" that God gives me, but to accept both his demands for me and the blessings that he has in store for me.
Happy New Year's for all my family and friends, I hope that God's blessings fall on each of you this year.
On the kidney transplant front, I'm still awaiting the final testing from one of my living donors. I ask my friends and family to pray for these folks. God said that what you do for the least of these, you do for me. He also promised to return their blessing a hundred fold. While I'm not sure what a hundred fold return on a kidney is, I pray Lord, let it be.
Saturday, December 8, 2012
God......why?
Dear God,
Why? In simply asking this question I feel like I am failing you. I have tried to keep my faith and trust in you at all times like I know I should, but the truth is.....sometimes fear and doubt are so strong that they push their way into my mind and I struggle. I don't understand these circumstances sometimes. I have always prayed that you would make me into the man, husband, and father that you envisioned me to be when you created me, but now I feel like a broken down version of all of those. I have had to give up my triathlon competitions......I am unable to go swimming with my son.....I am constantly having to take time to do dialysis instead of all the list of things a husband and father should be doing through the day. When I was first in the hospital and they were running tests, I lost my faith and strength. I sat shivering with fear on what my future would hold....and I couldn't feel you. I managed to get my nerves under control and focus on what the plan would be and tried to show my faith once the diagnosis came....and I felt almost numb...an unnerving calm even. I continued to show my faith to the nurses at the dialysis clinic and assured them that my God was in control and would heal me.....but my healing has not come. I have been able to continue to work and do the job I feel you called me to, but it is so hard to have to continuously worry about how I will get all my dialysis treatments done and pay all the bills and still keep Kyla at home with the kids. They are growing up so sweet and special. I know they are truly a gift from you and I am so thankful, but I wonder about the effect that watching their father have to constantly take medication and do dialysis will have on their peace of mind. I also worry about my father and his peace of mind. I have never seen him so concerned about me or question God's healing before. He is a spiritual giant, but he is also struggling with me not being immediately healed with prayer. Sometimes I just wonder if I have it in me to continue to hold on to my faith for this journey, it seems so hard. I want to be the man and father you planned for me to be, but I just can't understand.........but I will continue to trust that you know my future and still hold it in your hand.
Your struggling son,
Anthony
Dear Anthony,
Oh son, how I love you. I made you with a human spirit that is weak and questioning so that my grace and strength could be made perfect in you. I am neither upset or disappointed in you, but I am proud of all that you are. I call you my child because much like a child, your view is often limited. When your son had to have an injection to protect him, he didn't understand and it broke your heart when he cried. However, you knew that the result would be for his benefit. I have also wept at your pain and fear, but I know the plans I have for you. I am still molding you into the child I created you to be for me. I allowed you to train and race in triathlons not only because you were passionate about it (i planted that passion), but it also allowed your body to counteract the effects of the kidney failure for a long time. I knew that if you were diagnosed earlier, you would never have found the courage to long for and try for Aspen. If you remember, it wasn't long after you found out I was sending her to you that you were diagnosed. I didn't want you to miss out on her blessing in your life. You will return to those passions, but for now, you do not have those distractions in your life and are able to focus on your children. You will always cherish this time with them. When you were laying shivering in the hospital, I was trying to speak to you in my still small voice, but fear had made you unable to hear me. Therefore, I crawled into bed with you and held you until you finally felt my calm wash over you. You were not numb, but were experiencing the peace that passes your understanding. My strength was holding you up when you were given the diagnosis and were able to focus on what my plan would be for you. Though you feel that not getting an immediate healing was a failure in the nurses eyes, you never saw the strength that was passed into some of those nurses lives who are also my children. The faith that you showed was a small seed that I was able to grow miracles out of in other people's lives, though you will never see those fruits until you come to be with me in Heaven. Your children do not fear the future because of your life, on the contrary, they draw strength and build their faith on the building blocks that you give them everyday when you pray with them and teach them about me. Lincoln wakes in the morning singing because my hand is on his life and my peace runs throughout his soul. The foundation that you have begun in your children's lives will be the foundation that I continue to build on until they are all that I have planned for them. Your father will have the peace of mind when he comes to be with me that comes with having seen his son's faith at work and he will witness my hand in your family's life in a way that few fathers ever get to see. I will not only build your family's faith, but his as well. You have continued to be able to do the work that I sat before you on my strength, not yours. I will continue to hold you up and strengthen you to continue to do the job I called you to do. I have promised you that I would not only meet your needs, but I would poor out blessings on you according to my riches in Heaven. My blessings have already been on their way to you since before you knew there was a problem. I know the plans I have for you, and they are good. You will be overwhelmed with the works that I'm going to do in your life, and we are almost over the mountain. Remember, the last few turns at the top of the mountain are usually the hardest, but it's also the best views. I will always be holding you in my arms, even when you can't feel it. When you pray, I will always be there beside you, listening to every word, and though you may not understand the answer or the timing, my wisdom is beyond your understanding. Lastly son, I promised you that though sorrow lasts through the night, Joy comes in the morning... and the horizon is beginning to glow.
Your loving Heavenly Father,
God
Why? In simply asking this question I feel like I am failing you. I have tried to keep my faith and trust in you at all times like I know I should, but the truth is.....sometimes fear and doubt are so strong that they push their way into my mind and I struggle. I don't understand these circumstances sometimes. I have always prayed that you would make me into the man, husband, and father that you envisioned me to be when you created me, but now I feel like a broken down version of all of those. I have had to give up my triathlon competitions......I am unable to go swimming with my son.....I am constantly having to take time to do dialysis instead of all the list of things a husband and father should be doing through the day. When I was first in the hospital and they were running tests, I lost my faith and strength. I sat shivering with fear on what my future would hold....and I couldn't feel you. I managed to get my nerves under control and focus on what the plan would be and tried to show my faith once the diagnosis came....and I felt almost numb...an unnerving calm even. I continued to show my faith to the nurses at the dialysis clinic and assured them that my God was in control and would heal me.....but my healing has not come. I have been able to continue to work and do the job I feel you called me to, but it is so hard to have to continuously worry about how I will get all my dialysis treatments done and pay all the bills and still keep Kyla at home with the kids. They are growing up so sweet and special. I know they are truly a gift from you and I am so thankful, but I wonder about the effect that watching their father have to constantly take medication and do dialysis will have on their peace of mind. I also worry about my father and his peace of mind. I have never seen him so concerned about me or question God's healing before. He is a spiritual giant, but he is also struggling with me not being immediately healed with prayer. Sometimes I just wonder if I have it in me to continue to hold on to my faith for this journey, it seems so hard. I want to be the man and father you planned for me to be, but I just can't understand.........but I will continue to trust that you know my future and still hold it in your hand.
Your struggling son,
Anthony
Dear Anthony,
Oh son, how I love you. I made you with a human spirit that is weak and questioning so that my grace and strength could be made perfect in you. I am neither upset or disappointed in you, but I am proud of all that you are. I call you my child because much like a child, your view is often limited. When your son had to have an injection to protect him, he didn't understand and it broke your heart when he cried. However, you knew that the result would be for his benefit. I have also wept at your pain and fear, but I know the plans I have for you. I am still molding you into the child I created you to be for me. I allowed you to train and race in triathlons not only because you were passionate about it (i planted that passion), but it also allowed your body to counteract the effects of the kidney failure for a long time. I knew that if you were diagnosed earlier, you would never have found the courage to long for and try for Aspen. If you remember, it wasn't long after you found out I was sending her to you that you were diagnosed. I didn't want you to miss out on her blessing in your life. You will return to those passions, but for now, you do not have those distractions in your life and are able to focus on your children. You will always cherish this time with them. When you were laying shivering in the hospital, I was trying to speak to you in my still small voice, but fear had made you unable to hear me. Therefore, I crawled into bed with you and held you until you finally felt my calm wash over you. You were not numb, but were experiencing the peace that passes your understanding. My strength was holding you up when you were given the diagnosis and were able to focus on what my plan would be for you. Though you feel that not getting an immediate healing was a failure in the nurses eyes, you never saw the strength that was passed into some of those nurses lives who are also my children. The faith that you showed was a small seed that I was able to grow miracles out of in other people's lives, though you will never see those fruits until you come to be with me in Heaven. Your children do not fear the future because of your life, on the contrary, they draw strength and build their faith on the building blocks that you give them everyday when you pray with them and teach them about me. Lincoln wakes in the morning singing because my hand is on his life and my peace runs throughout his soul. The foundation that you have begun in your children's lives will be the foundation that I continue to build on until they are all that I have planned for them. Your father will have the peace of mind when he comes to be with me that comes with having seen his son's faith at work and he will witness my hand in your family's life in a way that few fathers ever get to see. I will not only build your family's faith, but his as well. You have continued to be able to do the work that I sat before you on my strength, not yours. I will continue to hold you up and strengthen you to continue to do the job I called you to do. I have promised you that I would not only meet your needs, but I would poor out blessings on you according to my riches in Heaven. My blessings have already been on their way to you since before you knew there was a problem. I know the plans I have for you, and they are good. You will be overwhelmed with the works that I'm going to do in your life, and we are almost over the mountain. Remember, the last few turns at the top of the mountain are usually the hardest, but it's also the best views. I will always be holding you in my arms, even when you can't feel it. When you pray, I will always be there beside you, listening to every word, and though you may not understand the answer or the timing, my wisdom is beyond your understanding. Lastly son, I promised you that though sorrow lasts through the night, Joy comes in the morning... and the horizon is beginning to glow.
Your loving Heavenly Father,
God
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Thanksgiving updates
Everyone has been doing the "What I'm thankful for" during November, and even though it's the beginning of December, I'd thought I'd list out a few things I'm thankful for.
First, I'm thankful for my kidney failure. No, I'm not going to say the whole "I'm thankful for this disease because it has shown me my inner strength or given me new perspective." I hate the whole idea and aspect of this issue and all the details of daily dialysis. However, when my family, and especially my kids, are sick or going through something like this, I often tell God that I wish he would have let me go through it and not my family. Therefore, I have to be thankful that if someone was going to face this in my family, that it was me.
I'm thankful for my relationship with God. Throughout this ordeal, he has given me strength and held me up. I have been at peace and felt his hand at work in every step of this journey and I continue to have faith that my life has a purpose and meaning. The apostle Paul went through many trials in his life, but God used those trials to bring increased faith and strength to others.
I'm thankful for my wonderful family, both immediate and extended. Our family has become so precious to me and is my strength and joy. I realize now that I only knew a very small view of true happiness before.
I'm thankful for the human spirit that is still alive and well all around me. I have had people that only know my family from church that have offered a kidney to me. I have had a nurse at my dialysis clinic offer a kidney to me when she has only known me a few months. I have had friends from church offer to give a kidney. It is one of the most humbling experiences in my life to be in a position to need someone to save your life and really have no way of doing it yourself.
And now for a quick update on my present situation.....if you aren't really interested in the details, please skip this part of the post.....
My possible donors are being tested. I have three possibilities at this point and if one of those are a match, I may be able to have a transplant in the next few months. Otherwise, I will have to await a kidney from the list. Dialysis at home is going well and all my levels have continued to be good. I am still able to work full time and work is great. I did have a kidney stone a few weeks ago that took me to the ER. thank goodness for dilaudid.....didn't feel anything for a few good hours.
Lastly, I wanted to thank all my friends and family for their prayers and well wishes. Please continue to remember me and my family, as well as the families of my possible donors. I wish everyone the best Christmas possible and hope that everyone stays healthy and can find the true joy of Christmas this year.
First, I'm thankful for my kidney failure. No, I'm not going to say the whole "I'm thankful for this disease because it has shown me my inner strength or given me new perspective." I hate the whole idea and aspect of this issue and all the details of daily dialysis. However, when my family, and especially my kids, are sick or going through something like this, I often tell God that I wish he would have let me go through it and not my family. Therefore, I have to be thankful that if someone was going to face this in my family, that it was me.
I'm thankful for my relationship with God. Throughout this ordeal, he has given me strength and held me up. I have been at peace and felt his hand at work in every step of this journey and I continue to have faith that my life has a purpose and meaning. The apostle Paul went through many trials in his life, but God used those trials to bring increased faith and strength to others.
I'm thankful for my wonderful family, both immediate and extended. Our family has become so precious to me and is my strength and joy. I realize now that I only knew a very small view of true happiness before.
I'm thankful for the human spirit that is still alive and well all around me. I have had people that only know my family from church that have offered a kidney to me. I have had a nurse at my dialysis clinic offer a kidney to me when she has only known me a few months. I have had friends from church offer to give a kidney. It is one of the most humbling experiences in my life to be in a position to need someone to save your life and really have no way of doing it yourself.
And now for a quick update on my present situation.....if you aren't really interested in the details, please skip this part of the post.....
My possible donors are being tested. I have three possibilities at this point and if one of those are a match, I may be able to have a transplant in the next few months. Otherwise, I will have to await a kidney from the list. Dialysis at home is going well and all my levels have continued to be good. I am still able to work full time and work is great. I did have a kidney stone a few weeks ago that took me to the ER. thank goodness for dilaudid.....didn't feel anything for a few good hours.
Lastly, I wanted to thank all my friends and family for their prayers and well wishes. Please continue to remember me and my family, as well as the families of my possible donors. I wish everyone the best Christmas possible and hope that everyone stays healthy and can find the true joy of Christmas this year.
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